Secret Side
by seabelangermly
Summary: Natalia has feelings. Who knew? Ivan listens to this unknown side of his sister.


It was a cold December night. Everyone was sleeping, except one. Natalia crept down the quiet, lonely hallway to her brother's room. Usually, he kept watch for her, but even he had to sleep once in awhile. She put her ear up to the door. It was cold, but the only noise was his steady breathing. She turned the knob, ever so slowly. Her plan would not work if he was awake. Easing the door open, she thought she heard him stir. Natalia froze. No. No. No. Go back to sleep. After 15 minutes of hearing no other signs that he was awake, she continued to inch the door open, slower this time. Soon enough it was open enough for her slim body to slip through. Careful to stay in the shadows by the walls, she silently worked her way around the perimeter of the room. Her brother's room was large, but she didn't hurry. The cold winter air chilled her through her thin nightgown. Why has Brother left the window open? As she approached Ivan's bed, her heart quickened. She couldn't help it. Since the window was open and the shades were drawn, Natalia could see his sleeping body outlined by moonlight. She was beside the bed now. This was the hardest part. She gently put a foam earplug in each of his perfect ears. Now she could speak to him and he wouldn't notice unless she raised her voice. What she didn't realize was that one of the earplugs had fallen out after she had put it in.

"Good evening Ivan." She began, her voice just above a whisper. "Today, you tore my heart out. I forgive you. I wish you would stop rejecting me." Ivan's eyes opened, aware of another presence in his bedroom. His little sister, her voice hurt and broken, stood over him. He had a single foam earplug in. Though the window was open and his face was cold, his body was warm under all his blankets. Natalia, he noticed, was wearing a sleeveless nightgown that didn't even reach her knees. She must be cold, he thought. He wanted to run from her, because she frightened him most of the time, but he listened to her monologue. "I feel alone in the world. I don't have any friends. You're my only comfort, except you're never there. When you run, I don't know what to do. Deep down I know that I shouldn't scare you. It's my last resort. I need you, brother. I just don't know how to tell you because you don't like being around me at all. Someday, I will tell you this when you can hear me. I just get so nervous around you. I can't ever think of the right words. The only thing I can think to say is 'marry me.' That's not what I want. I want to be loved, accepted. I chose you, Brother, because you don't have many true friends either. I know what it's like to be lonely. I just wish we could love each other. Nobody loves me. I wish I could change, but I don't like looking vulnerable. It would be too late now anyways. Everybody thinks I'm an obsessive monster. You do, too. I love you, Ivan. Thanks for listening." She set a sunflower on his bedside table. So that's where all my precious flowers appear from, Russia concluded. He watched by moonlight as his sister almost floated outcof the room. She was always stealthy, but he couldn't even hear her feet touch the ground in the silent room. He felt as if he should say something to let her know he heard.

When she was inching out the doorway, he spoke. "Goodnight, Natalia."

She whirled around, fast but still silent. Her eyes were wide and she looked extremely nervous. Of course, Ivan thought, she didn't want me to hear this. She just needed someone to talk to. Talking again would just make her anxious. She might even revert back to her seemingly-obsessive self. Ivan closed his eyes and lay still. Hopefully, she would think he mumbled it in his sleep or that she was hearing things. Natalia stayed frozen for a long time, unsure if she actually heard her brother speak. No, he had earplugs in. She continued her silent footsteps back to her own bedroom and fell asleep.

That morning, she woke with Ivan's sunflower in a vase by her head. So, he had heard her...


End file.
